Painful sex? You’re not alone, not even a little bit. Pain with sex is common; studies show that almost 75 percent of women have experienced it. It's even got its own specific medical term: dyspareunia, which covers every kind of genital or pelvic pain about sexual experiences, with or without penetration and before or after the experience.
In contrast to diagnosis for male sexual pain or dysfunction (which is typically more easily diagnosed partly due to a long history of gender bias— in the world— but specifically in medical education), female sexual dysfunction often dismissed or mislabeled because it depends on the individual’s perspective on their symptoms. For instance, female sexual dysfunction is an umbrella term that covers symptoms like pain during sex, low libido, and difficulty with arousal or orgasm.
There are many things that can influence how sex feels: pelvic floor muscles, libido levels, sleep levels, trauma, inadequate foreplay and lubrication, breast-feeding (which lowers estrogen), postpartum recovery, negative feelings about the partner, infection, hormonal birth control (which can affect the bodies’ #estrogen and #testosterone levels, causing changes in the vaginal tissues) and other life factors. There can also be fairly serious underlying clinical causes that can usually be resolved with holistic or pharmaceutical treatments.
Bottom line: you don’t have to suffer through painful sex, and you definitely don’t have to suffer alone. You deserve pleasurable sexual experiences
FIBROIDS 〰️ before I began Flora & Fauna, i had heard statistics about fibroids and i vaguely remember seeing @cynthiabailey10’s journey with fibroids on RHOA. since i have began creating spaces to talk about our bodies, there have been countless women who have called, texted, DM’d me about how fibroids have impacted their lives: severely heavy and painful periods, swollen abdomens, extreme fatigue, low iron levels, blood transfusions, hysterectomies, fertility challenges. it’s crazy how many of us suffer in silence. WE NEED TO TALK ABOUT FIBROIDS MORE! research says that 89-90% of all black women will have 1 fibroid by the age of 50. our silence is our own enemy. it leads us to suffer alone and without vital information.
#fibroids are abnormal, non cancerous tissue growths in or on the uterus. they can be a small as a pea or grow to the size of a grapefruit, thus enhancing the #fupa (and cuing insensitive and unsolicited remarks such as “are you pregnant?”—gtfoh). sometimes the symptoms aren’t extreme and a person may not notice them until they are trying to conceive.
being informed about our bodies allows us to be proactive about our health + our healing.
love to @roscoespears for sharing her journey with fibroids. feel free to share your story below.
What does sisterhood mean to you?
“Eventually I landed on the word Maternity. There are so many river that can flow into maternity. Interchangeable are the words friend and sister, friend and mother, mother and sister; to be a sister is to be a friend to an exponent—and vice versa. And within that exponent is the infinite. I have stood in the gap for my own mother to care for my younger sisters both by blood or by journey. I have been cared for in maternal ways by my older sister. I love my friends as a mother; to be a woman is often times an instinctual need to rescue, protect and guide to safety...a responsibility to see love through which is sometimes a weary yet satisfying service.”
words + visuals: @hiaj
creative dir: @coolandbrown + @amazing_li18
glowing mama: @pinc.events
For more of this beautiful piece, check the link in @hiaj’s bio 💛
Have you ever wondered exactly what it means when your water breaks? Is it the water balloon-like gush that we see in the movies? 💦 It can be, but it tends to have more chill. (Spoiler: it usually feels like a slow, pee-like trickle).
What we refer to as "water breaking" is actually the tearing of the amniotic sac (the thin membrane that lines the uterus and keeps growing human + amniotic fluid safeley inside). The amniotic sac doesnt contain any nerve endings, so this isn't typically a painful experience.
You might be surpised to know that the breaking of the waters only begins first stage labor in 30% of pregnancies. In fact, no one has been able to pinpoint the exact reason that labor begins (my response: "because God said so, duh!”).
For the majority of people, the water breaking doesn’t happen until later in labor—the cinematic gush usually hapens with further cervix dialation and stronger contractions. This can be unassisted or assited via purposeful breaking of the sac by the birth attendant, the later being less common and should only occur with INFORMED CONSENT (enter: your trusted doula).
In rare cases, the sac doesn’t break at all and baby is born still inside the sac. This is called being born "en caul" and is considered an auspicious sign in many cultures—apparently you need to enter the world this way to be the Dalai Lama!
📷: @empoweredbirthproject
Today marks the 46th anniversary of Roe v. Wade, the 1973 landmark U.S. Supreme Court decision that established the constitutional right to access abortion.
Black women had abortions—largely unsafe—before Roe too. Still today, women of color are also more likely to experience barriers to abortion and other reproductive and maternal health services, including contraception, maternity care, and screenings for reproductive cancers.
On the heels of MJK Jr. Day and the Women’s March, I acknowledge the progress we have made and the work that we have to do. Support is a verb—here are some great orgs to support doing incredible intersectional, reproductive justice work: @ancientsong @sistersong_woc @sparkrjnow @blackmamasmatter @blkwomenshealth @feministcenter @birthequity
Launching Flora & Fauna has been an extreme lesson in vulnerability, the uncomfortable and scary kind (is there another type?). I decided to create a space where women of color could gather with the idea that we all have vulnerabilities that would be better shared. Because we are all going through something. And connection heals.
This was my way of changing just a little piece of the world. We talked and sipped lots of wine. We shared stories about our wombs and reproductive experiences. We cried and laughed. We made new connections and supported other black women.
Sometimes we're pushed to do things before we really understand the true why. Me? The woman who has mastered the art of deflecting attention for the sake of caring for others. Put myself and my visions out to the world? How? Why? To heal. To change. To care for self. This first event was so special and I cant wait for the next.
Special thank yous to @antylc and @forkeepsbooks for opening her space for us, to my sisters @mellimelatl and @mayatable for showing up and showing out, to @__rita.p for your camera skillssss, to @thisishermarket for contributing custome female-designed gift bags, to @lowdownbrown and @deemingo who surprised me in the flesh and to everyone who was present. I appreciate you all forever.
